Commentator:
Hello and welcome to what looks like being a very exciting race today
Among the top drivers are Noddy Holder of the Brahms and Lizst Cup
His team mate is one of Britain’s wildest fellows, James Lea. Let’s hope his accident record can be overcome today. And now, just coming down the straight in the all familiar black and gold colours, Dave Hill, one of motor racing’s true Super Yob’s. His team mate is Don Powell. And my goodness me from where I’m sitting it looks as though they’re ready to explode!

Driver:
Sitting here in my mean machine – I’m ready to explode
Looking out of my helmet at the faces
I been wondering all night long, if I will live or die…yeah
It’s always the same before the races

Commentator:
I got some hot line information about the man who’s occupation
Is driving the cars. Standing out there on the grid
And it’s a kind of fascination and it demands full concentration
The kind of a job we all dreamed of as a kid

Driver:
I can see on the track ahead, the heat is rising high
Gotta win for the team and it’s never easy
I been feeling the butterflies, strapped into my seat…yeah
And already the tension’s getting to me

Commentator:
We’re waiting in anticipation for some official indication
They’re ready to go. Revving up and hit the road
Cos it’s another big occasion and there won’t be no relaxation
They’re ready to go and they’re Ready to Explode

Driver:
You’re gonna drive ’em round the bend
Have a go on the chicane
Gonna drive ’em round the bend
Without a warning…
Ready now to explode

Commentator:
And now the cars are on the grid and it looks like today’s conditions
Couldn’t be better for a great race. We’re just waiting for the starter
Mister Slade to give the O.K. There goes the green light and they’re off!

Who’s gonna be the big sensation. Who’ll be the champion of the nation
In one of them cars standing out there on the grid
He’s gonna get a big ovation. Be the champion of the nation
The kind of a thrill we all dreamed of as a kid

I don’t wanna break down and I wanna explode
Don’t lemme break down, don’t lemme break down
Don’t lemme break down
I wanna explode – I wanna explode – I wanna explode – I wanna explode

Driver:
Ever since I was just thirteen I had a crazy reoccurring dream
To be faster than the speed of sound
It was the only way to get around…oh yeah
Speeding in my dreams – Speeding in my dreams
Seventeen and I passed my test, never settling for second best
I knew right away what I’d like – It was a 750 motorbike…oh yeah
Speeding in my dreams – Speeding in my dreams
Oh yeah…Oh yeah…Oh yeah
I was living for speed
L..L..L..Living for speed
I was living for
I was living for speed…
Explode…explode….

Song: Ready to Explode by Slade, 1984
Written by Noddy Holder and Jim Lea

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If there is any one piece of media that focused my love of racing, it was perhaps this song that I first heard in 1984 from Slade’s “Keep Your Hands off My Power Supply” album. I was the perfect age, 17, when it came out and while the song made no splash on the charts, it has always been one of my favorites and I listen to it more intently than I do to 95% of the other songs I listen to. Since it is somewhere in the seven, eight or nine minute range, that is quite impressive for my tastes. It paints such a vivid picture of the tension at the start of a race. I think it works particularly well when matched with this game.

Back at the Essendarium, the 40 starting drivers and various team owners have congregated in the driver’s room four hours before the race. Tension is high as the race director begins to collect the lug nuts from each team and places them in a hub cap. They are loudly swirled around and his lovely assistant reaches up over her head to draw the team that will start in the number one position. She opens her hand and checks the engraving in the steel. She then cheerfully shouts, “X-treme Hazard has the number one spot!” Lead Jacket Pattison steps to the board and writes 888 in the number one spot on the whiteboard, assigning his Rabbit, “Killer” Lalumiere in his Lamborghini Diablo to the pole position. Once the murmurs die down, Samantha reaches up and draws a second chunk of steel from the hubcap, this time it’s the Deadbeats. Lord Eckman steps to the board and writes 115 in the number 2 spot. Stina has been assigned the second spot in the grid and will run her Chrysler 200 out next to the Lalumiere’s Diablo. The pace of the drawing picks up, the Mountaineers are drawn third and “Dangerous” Derek and his Dodge Cobra are placed next to Stina. The front row is finished off with The Fist being drawn into the fourth spot on the outside. That spot is filled with “Jackhammer” Brennan and his Pontiac Grand Prix. For the next hour, all forty spots on the grid are filled. The drivers file out of the office complex and begin the ballet that is required to get each car to its designated spot on the grid.

The starting setup in Apocalypse Road is both similar and slightly different than it is in Grand Prix or Thunder Alley. All of the cars are placed randomly on the grid in sets as large as the number of teams in the field. Each race will have four or five cars per team in the race depending on the number of teams competing. The more cars and the more teams, the better the competition will be. The maximum number of cars that a race will utilize at one time is 40.

Cars are placed on the grid, which on the Apocalypse Road tracks are either in front of the finish line or extensions that enter the track in front of the Finish Line. This allows for an easier method of keeping score, since any time a car crosses the finish line it scores a point. By not allowing cars to cross the finish line at the start of the race, many problems are negated that could otherwise sow confusion and complaint.

When setting up the grid for an Apocalypse Road race on a non-Apocalypse Road track, set the grid from back to front with the last car in the race being placed right in front of the Start/Finish line and moving forward along the track. The Apron is in play on these tracks, there is no pitting in Apocalypse Road much like there is indeed no crying in baseball.

I started thanking owners and drivers on the second team, but I would be remiss if I didn’t go back and thank the people that have supported us and sponsored team first team I discussed, the Hazleton Mountaineers.

Hazleton Mountaineers

R. Blaise Conti from Hazleton, Pennsylvania (Max Jamelli)

Jean-Luc “Frankenstein” Simard             (X9X)    Jean-Luc Simard

“Dangerous” Derek Ciamell (2)              Max Jamelli

Lob Jammer (21)                                   Max Jamelli

Maria “The Maniac” Ciamell (M77)        Max Jamelli

Soonsin Lee (J96)                                  Joseph Lee

Zach “Dash” Dashall (Z88)                       Joseph Lee

Tricia “C” Mahaffey (60c)                        Franky Geldof

Thor (806)                                             Stig Morten Breiland

There are many driver spots still available. If you are so inclined, for $20 you receive the following benefit.

•      Driver Naming Rights allowing you to name one driver and assign that driver a 1 to 3 digit ID.

If you would like to sponsor the white/gray, pink, light green or green team for $100 you would receive the following benefits.

• Naming Rights including Team Name, Owner Name, Team Location, Team Color and Logo Input.
• Driver Naming Rights allowing you to Name one driver and assign that driver a 1 to 3 digit ID.

If this interests you, please contact Jeff Horger at jagrcz68@aol.com and we can get the ball rolling. There are still also drivers available on many teams. Carla & I are happy to help all of you that want to be a part of the Thunderverse to get on to a team.

If you just want to play the game, we need your votes with your wallet on the GMT P500 right now. We’ve made the cut and sit at 518 orders right now, but there is absolutely no reason to not get your game reserved early. If you back it now the discount is pretty substantial ($72 down to $49) so now is the time to get in on the deal. https://www.gmtgames.com/p-623-apocalypse-road.aspx

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